A Woman’s Nation Pushes Back from the Brink

A Woman’s Nation Pushes Back from the Brink: Executive Summary. I wanted to attach the link to the "Paycheck to Paycheck" story for anyone interested in reading more about it.

Paycheck to Paycheck

I watched the show "Paycheck to Paycheck" on Oprah's Townhall last night with Maria Shriver. I had also seen the HBO documentary about Katrina Gilbert. When I first watched that documentary I actually ended up switching channels because I found it so depressing. Not because her story is so sad, but because I could relate to it and seeing my reality in hers hit a little to close to home. But now after seeing Oprah's Townhall show I feel more inspired. Inspired to do something. I, like millions of other women, live on the edge of financial catastrophe. I often look around at my apartment, that I worked so hard to make cheery and cute, and see it not as my "home", but almost like it's a mirage. It doesn't ever seem real. Because in my head, I know that at anytime, unexpectedly, it can all disappear. One wrong move, one rent payment not paid for one reason or another, and it's all gone and my daughter and I are living in my car or on someone's couch. It makes me crazy. All this crap about the "American Dream" that has been shoved down all our throats since we were kids, how we can be "anything" when we grow up......it's all bullshit. If a person doesn't know the right people, have the right amount of money or have a piece of paper from a college saying you have a degree, then basically it appears you are nothing. You don't count. Your opinion doesn't matter, you don't matter. A person can be highly and naturally skilled and capable of doing a job, but unless you have a piece of paper from a college saying so, it doesn't matter. I find that infuriating. Millions of people are not working or can't find work that pays more than $8.50 an hour because employers only want the ones who are perfect. And even when they find the perfect one, they still pay them garbage wages. A piece of paper and millions of years of experience shouldn't be what identifies us. People are more than just a college degree. We all come from years of experience. So what if it wasn't in the exact field of the job we are applying for. That doesn't mean we aren't capable. This downward spiral has to stop. People need to be given a chance. Men and Women. So many unemployed, underemployed, homeless. It's sickening. What is happening? Where is this all going to lead? How can one person make a difference? I don't know. But I'm going to try to find out.

I'm A Late Bloomer

I started having kids in my very early twenties, I sort of short changed my young adulthood. I wasn't the girl going out to parties and staying up all night. Well, I was, but not for long. My first child was born when I was 21. I was a single mother. Everything I thought I was going to do and had planned for in my head, came to a screeching halt. I then proceeded to have three more children, and one divorce, over the next six years. Now, here I am, in my forties, feeling like a teenager all over again. Not because I'm reliving my lost youth, but because I have found myself as a middle aged lady with not a lot of substantial work experience under my belt. I may as well be 18 again. When potential employers interview me, (if I can even get an interview), they always look perplexed as to why I have had so many odd jobs over the years. Some wildly different from the others. From a sales clerk at the mall, to a manicurist at every salon in town, to a paralegal for a well known law firm. Interviewers want to know..."Who are you? And why are you applying here to be a research assistant?".....nothing makes any sense. I'm all over the road when it comes to employment. And that may very well be because I have always had to jump around from job to job, taking whatever came my way. Sometimes the hours sucked, more often, the pay rate sucked, lack of experience, boredom with the job itself etc. etc. Don't get me wrong, I'm pretty smart. I just put my life on hold so I could raise my children. So I always ended up with mediocre jobs that went nowhere.

Now to get to the point of the story.......my mother would always tell me that I have plenty of time to get my career in order. Once the kids are grown, you can focus on yourself......blah, blah, blah. Here's the kicker....now that my kids are grown and now I'm in my mid forties, most employers think I'm a fruit loop for being such a job hopper for the last twenty years and hesitate to hire me, (I think a majority of the people in my age group have been working in the same field for many years at this point in their lives, which explains why they get the job offers and I don't), and I certainly don't want to incur more student loan debt than I already have by going back to school, so what do I do? Where do I go from here? Well, after much anguishing and internal soul searching, I have come to the conclusion that I am a late bloomer.  I am really just starting out on my career path and that is okay. It has to be okay. There really is no other option but to keep going forward. I'm sure I'm not the only one. As a matter of fact, my chosen career may depend on it.

I know just how it feels to be standing at the split in the road, not really sure which path to take. If you go to the left, maybe that is wrong and you'll be sorry, again. But how do you know if taking the path on the right is the correct way? How can you even be sure your smart enough to make a rational decision for yourself that won't eventually blow up in your face? What if your middle aged and you still don't have a clue about what career you even want?!! I know just how you feel. It is hard and incredibly stressful to think that the decision you make today, may be one you will have to live with until you get to retirement age. So we put so much pressure on ourselves to make a great and appropriate career choice. Too much pressure. So much so that we, I know I did, become paralyzed and sometimes end up not making any choice at all.

So....I'm still working on that "choice". I've narrowed down my options to something in the healing and helping others category. What that will be, I still don't know.


"Your crown has been bought and paid for. All you must do is put it on" - James Baldwin